Struggles

All I can say is OMG learning new ways is so hard!  I wish a magic wand existed to make the things I want to happen, happen.  I mean wouldn't it be wonderful if it wasn't hard to achieve the things that we perceive we want?  What makes it such a challenge to take the leap and force change? What is that hidden piece that stops us from moving on?  I don't have the answers to these questions yet, in fact I'm still working on them! I thought that maybe posting here that it was a struggle would make it more real and concrete.  Maybe I am not the only one who struggles with change.  Even when it seems like it should be easy.  I said that I needed to make a schedule for myself and so far I have been unsuccessful in this I have made steps though like I have painted and I have done some sewing I just haven't achieved these things how I imagine that I want them.  I know a schedule is good for me and I plan to explore what it is that is getting in my way.  I think I have some issues that are stuck inside and I haven't figured out yet, and for me I think that some of these issues have to do with my resistance to having to work within new limits.  I afterall, didn't have any limits before this injury.  I was free to do life as I wanted and had nothing getting in my way.  So I am sure this has something to do with it, but that can't be everything and how on earth do you jump over that hurdle I mean that isn't a small hurdle it is rather large to take in that you have to make concessions and do things differently or even in ways that you do not really want to.  So my work now includes learning what is getting in my way.  I will keep you posted on how things are going with this issue.  My painting from the activities page is in the works, and I have to work more on my schedule so I can achieve the things I want.  I have made the smallest start by acknowledging what it is I am doing right and trying not to judge what it is I am doing wrong. So hopefully things will pick up although I have to promise myself and you all that I will not judge myself harshly if I do not live up to my own expectations things will happen and I must allow them to unfold and not judge my progress.  I am ok as I am, things could be better and I can change but I am ok as I am.  I think that statement feels nonjudgmental maybe!

Well good luck to those of you who are in the process of working on change!  What changes are you working on I am open to dialog about this issue I think that healing and change for women can often occur with support doing it alone is hard.  That is part of the reason I started this blog to have a place women can share and get support and not struggle with learning self love by themself.  So if you have somethings you are working on please share and hopefully we can all learn together!

Cheers